Re: WHEN WILL THE LIST SERVER BE FIXED?
Re: WHEN WILL THE LIST SERVER BE FIXED?
- Subject: Re: WHEN WILL THE LIST SERVER BE FIXED?
- From: Chuq Von Rospach <email@hidden>
- Date: Fri, 16 Feb 2001 10:06:24 -0800
On 2/15/01 11:56 PM, "Cal" <email@hidden> wrote:
>
I wonder how pounding on him will change anything --
>
other than triggering his protector (sorry, that's Jungian
>
psyche-speak).
Actually, Cal, what usually happens with me is it makes me sit down and try
to find alternatives. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Sometimes people
suggest them. I try very hard not to keep grudges or take things too
personally -- you dno't survive doing this stuff without a thick skin and a
realization that people are throwing things at the position, not the person.
Which doesn't mean I don't get ruffled, it means I try to not STAY ruffled.
That just tends to escalate problems. I'd rather solve them. But at some
level, that ALSO means cutting through the noise to try to find the things
not thought of, and to stay focussed on the issue, not the fight (as Paul
found out, when I cut his argument off unilaterally -- it wasn't solving the
probem, it wasn't offering alternatives, and it was getting in the way of
finding them, and I didn't have the time or interest in babying the thing
back into a positive discussion, since he didn't seem interesting in trying
to go that way. His note to this list yesterday convinces me I made the
right choice, even though I hated to be so brusque to him. Sometimes you
need a little tough love -- but you don't have to like doing it.)
--
Chuq Von Rospach, Apple Mail List Gnome
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